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User:Optimatum

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Revision as of 12:19, 27 February 2009 by Optimatum (talk | contribs)
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"I have evidence that contradicts his existence!"

~ Apollo Justice on the Optimatum.

"OVERRULED."

~ All his classmates on Optimatum.

"He's a foolhardy foolish fool who foolishly fools his foolish self into foolishly thinking that he can foolishly contirbute to this foolhardy foolish community foolishly known as "Bulbapedia", fool."

~ Franziska von Karma on Optimatum.

"He's like my seventeenth cup of coffee. Always the bitterest"

~ Godot* on Optimatum

"Who again?"

~ Optimatum on the Optimatum.
List of recommended users that could fit into this table:
To be yelled at - To spam someone's talkpage - To learn more about wikicoding and CSS - To be shouted at
To be scolded
Ivan Helric
OBJECTION!
Optimatum-1.png
Age 13
Gender Neither.
Hometown Singapore
Region South East Asia
Relatives Orphaned.
Class Trainer

Team

Leafeon, Baton Dancer Absol, Baton Pass reliant Puncher Gallade, Physical Sweepah Shedinja, Toxic Staller Darkrai, because I abuse Ubers Lanturn, Rain Dancer*Houndoom, Sunny Day Ninetales, Special staller Breloom, Sub PuncherSharpedo, pathetic attempt at Physical Sweeping

132.png This user is transgender.
132.png This user is bisexual.
Spr DP Officer.png This user is frequently on patrol.
Bulbapedia logo.png This user is not a membre of Bulbapedia.
446.png This user is calm, despite the fact that he's not a membre of Bulbapedia.
037.png This user holds grudges, despite being calm.
File:Pokeball.jpg This user owns every Generation IV game, whether in English or in Japanese.
File:000Unknown.png This user is objectionable.
491.png This user is unforgiving.
098.png This user deals massive damage.
Notchie.png This user can slam his table.
File:DP Guitarist.png This user can play the air guitar.
150.png All your base are belong to us!
164.png O RLY?
258Mudkip.png This user lieks Mudkipz.
000.png YOU JUST LOST THE GAME.
File:Barack obama.jpg This user has been BarackRolled .
Magmar Falcon Punch.png FALCON PUNCH!!!
475.png THIS IS SPARTA!!!

Siarnaq.png

Optimatum, otherwise ThatKidWithNoOriginality, has been part of the Bulbapedia community for approximately 18 months. It can barely come online nowadays due to obvious reasons. That and its laptop kinda blue screened.

Base Stats

Stat Base At Lv. 50 At Lv. 100
Min. Max. Min. Max.
HP: 100
 
 160 207 310 404
Attack: 10
 
 13 68 22 130
Defense: 15
 
 18 73 31 141
Special Attack: 150
 
 139 222 274 438
Special Defense: 65
 
 63 128 121 251
Speed: 85
 
 81 150 157 295
Total: 425 These stats are purely for humor only. =D
  • Minimum stats are calculated with 0 EVs, IVs of 0, and a hindering nature.
  • Maximum stats are calculated with 252 EVs, IVs of 31, and a helpful nature.

How Optimatum discovered Pokeyman

It's Pokémon, twit. Not Namyekop, the demon of yellow and pink.

Nah, I just turned on the TV and, lookie! Pokeyman! =D

Timeline of user events

June 2007: Signs up on Bulbapedia.

October 2007 (I think, memory's a blur): Forms "UEP" with Fraulein Tina, Herr Ryguy and Herr Shiny.

November 2007: UEP declared illegal. The other three disappear.

December 2007: Announces probable break.

July 2008: Takes break for 3 months

October 2008: Returns, disturbed by userspace ban.

Late October 2008: Gets pissed at some random guy.

November 2008: Gets banned.

December 2008: Tries to leave Bulbapedia for good.

Late December 2008/Early January 2009: Forced to come back by some idiots who are stalking him. Okay fine, they're not stalking me nor are they idiots. But they're close to stalking!

February 2009: Fraulein Tina returns. Bah, humbug. If Herr Wronguy and Her Shiny return too, then I'll...oh wai-

18th: Herr Wronguy returns. Now, if only a certain Shiny would return, then the four of us would be back together, ja?
...On second thoughts, that sounds like a bad idea to me. (This is why I don't like childhood old friends).

The 13 Rules of Bulbapedia:

  1. You MUST NOT have other Manuals before the Manual of Style. Even if it's your computer's "How-To-Avoid-Crashes" manual.
  2. You MUST NOT call TTE biased, because he is god. Rule number 5 applies to this as well.
  3. You like someone on Bulbapedia (quoting DCM). Hell, even I do.
  4. DON'T vandalize articles. And rules are meant to be broken.
  5. You MUST break this rule.
  6. You CAN stalk anyone on Bulbapedia, provided they are a girl. And yes, Kogs, that applies to you as well.
  7. You MUST NOT EVER admit that you watch/look at hentai. You WILL be ignored for the rest of your life.
  8. You CAN say you're leaving - and you can come back in minutes/hours.
  9. You MUST earn the Golden Slowpoke award. It's the ultimate privilege.
  10. You MUST use AIM to contact an admin.
  11. You MUST NOT be religious. Don't preach ANYWHERE. Or TTE will hunt you down. And kill you.
  12. You MUST NOT obey any of the above rules. Rule 5 applies to this rule.

And the last rule:
Rule 34: You CANNOT ask about this rule. Ever.

The End

Yes, yes, it was short. Don't blame me, that's all I could come up with on short notice.

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